The Other Cemetery Stories

I have a confession: I like Halloween better than Christmas. If there's a chance for a family gathering, going to the 'panchong' (as they call cemeteries in Cavite) is something I don't want to miss.

When my grandfather, Lolo Ric, was still alive, he would be the first to go and clean the burial area of our his parents, his sister and her husband, his niece, and three babies including my brother. He'd also be the last to leave. He would wait til all candles are out, all prayers of my lola have been said, and the sun has been long gone.

Lolo Ric would joke about wishing that if he were to die, he'd wish to be placed in hell, because he is so sure his wife, my lola lil, would be in heaven since she spends almost all of her waking hours in prayer.

Everyone knew he was deathly scared of dying.

He passed away in June 2005, and my tito deo took his place in cleaning up in the pancho since. I remember when we were younger, he would tell me about the death of my eldest brother. My mom's first child, kuya isaac, was born Sept 2, 1979. He died the same day. My mom, in her fragile condition, did not know right away. My lola did not want her to know just yet. Just as my dad was signing the death certificate, my mom gained consciousness and asked about the baby. My dad simply said, "nakalalaki kagad si mama (mom had a boy on the first try)". My dad and Tito deo buried kuya isaac in cavite. Tito would say after a week, he would see a line of ants crawling down a small hole to where they buried him. Years and decades later, my mom would tell me that she wish they just told her right away. Her heart was so broken.

Today, we went to the cemetery again. In front of my buried grandfather, my dad said, "Your lolo and I were really ok". They were buddies, or he said he hoped they were real buddies and my Lolo wasn't just bluffing. He told me stories of them meeting up after work near the house to drink together. He said lolo would cheat and put more drinks on my dad's glass when he's already drunk so he'll get more drunk; how he was such a cigarette addict that he'd take a puff every spoonful of rice in a meal. He would also put shots of hard liquor in their coffee everytime my dad visits him in the office.

Of all the stories, there's one thing that I will never forget: my dad said my lolo used to always tell him "Kung hindi ka magloko sa kabataan mo, wala kang maikukwento pagtanda mo."

I looked at my dad and how his face, his eyes, and his smile reminisced at that moment when my lolo said that. I knew right there he didn't let my lolo down.


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Photo # 1: Lolo Sebio and Lola Para, the parents of Lolo Ric, when they were married.
Photo # 2: Lolo Ric, who passed away June 12, 2005. Born in 1929.
Photo # 3: My mother's side of the family. She's the one on the left most of the photo.
Photo # 4: My dad and I last year.